Thursday, July 30, 2009

Blame it on the summer......

Hello my fellow bloggies, i have been AWOL for a longgggggg hot minute and no i did not forget you guys i've just had alot to do. I am really lazy i have confessed but hey it's summer and it is officially time to let my hair down and breathe. I do not want to care about anything or use my brain at all....cuz am chilling! So my summer has been chill basically, winning some, losing some but that's the way the ball bounces i guess so i have no objections to that. I am goin on a cruise with my family sometime in about 2 weeks *Big grinnnnnnnnnnn* I can't wait.

PS: Chocolate has been a vegetarian for a long time now (A vegetarian that does not eat vegetables for thta matter....Talk about confusion)and it is beginning to concern me. I have tried every trick possible for her to eat meat but Nothing works, no meat, chicken or according to her she "doesn't eat anything with a face".

So I have been alone for a while now as my boo is on summer vacation in Naija....**sooobbbbbbb. We speak everyday and i trust that he is being a good guy but he needs to come back, i officially miss him (even though i would not let him know how much) lol. I have not been shopping lately i can not believe it, I decided to de-clutter my stuff cuz i noticed when things are evrywhere I feel congested and it makes my life cluttered as i can't think or anything so yeah i am taking out stuff i have not used in about 2 years/things i forgot i had...It's going to be painful but i will let them go.

I am sooooooo ready to go back to naija in december. I've been suffering from U.K overload. I also learnt about love languages lately....hehe, Yes call me stale and what not am sure some of you are still in the dark, google Love Languages and see what yours is,(Find out why some relationships have been lacking, you probably were not communicating well)....I found out mine is Quality time and physical touch. Sorry i am having a real bad random post today.

So tell me why i got home one day after a long exhausting time out and was soo hungry, i walked into the kitchen of my flat (i have about 4 flatmates i know nothing about) there were plates and pots and cups all littered in the sink and i CAN'T stand dirt at all! Don't get me wrong ofcourse i could easily wash them but the fact that this is something i have been talking about, the funny part is the pot i was ready to use, i found it in the bin with food stains on it. I just went back out of the house to avoid unnecessary chaos.

In addition to my randomness, here are a few random facts:
~Butterlfies taste with their feet.

~Most elephants weigh less than the tongue of a blue whale.

~Rats are incapable of puking.

~The human eye blinks an average of 4,200,000 times a year.

~A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.

K enough of the random tales. Have a great week guys.

Check this awt....and leave a comment!

Friday, July 24, 2009

He Said 'I Love You'....What does that mean?

What does love mean? I've heard the word so many times that it is beginning to lose its flavor. Everyone is saying they are in love, the ones that have a huge sign on their head saying 'I can't wait to get in your pants!' the ones that want to dig and wound the guys wallet and vice versa and the ones that are looking for a club buddy on friday nights have all becomes acquainted to the term LOVE unfortunately. Growing up, i was taught love is sacred and it's a wonderful feeling once you get in. i use to admire the newly wedded couples on the thanksgiving sunday after their wedding on saturdays. I could not wait to finally be in their position. n this day of technology and the likes, please, i do not think i want to hear the word love for a minute. is it just me or the word has lost its meaning? You walk on the street and some nitwit that has never set eyes on you calls you out saying they love you....Right!

As a child, i was taught the 1 cor. 13 definition of love and till today, i unfortunately weigh everyone according to that scale of:

1) Love is patient...Is love really patient today? You say something to your spouse and the next thing they want to flip out and tear your face up. He says he loves you and wants to sleep with you to prove it. If it's really love why not wait till you put a rock or even a pebble on her finger first?

2) Love is kind...You are sitting with the person you 'love' and he calls some other girl on the phone to hook up while you are there. He does not even respect you to wait til you go or to even merely pretend you are a diamond in the little time you spend together.

3) Love does not envy...Ladies you sit and wish upon a star every other day on how you wish you had that ladies kinda this or that so your man would give you more attention or how you wish your relationship would just be like theirs, why not plan on fixing yours in the time you use to imagine and hope for what would not come?

4) Love does not boast...Hmmmmmmm, bobo comes to see you jejely in your house but he needs you to come out and see that his new car jus got scratched by a little nail you would not even notice if you were not shown. Or you just have to be aware that his father is so so and so in government.Why shouldnt he sit and plan on making a difference or building up some form of future for himself?

5) Love is not rude...Some relationships i see now, i pity the girls. Why would they not kukuma come out of it now before they finally marry? that is if they will ever.The boy has already given them warning not to come out of the room once his friends are in the house....shooooooo! Them sef like Iyawo (new wife) will not come out. Hmmmm let me know what will cause that!

6) Love is not self-seeking...It is all about Me, Myself and I, what happened to given up the I's for Us?

7) Love is not easily angered...This is even too much, you do not need to do too much strong head, when the girl gives you that 'eye' that will send you to your early grave you will just arrange yourself. Lwkm . Some guys just wait for you to press THAT button so that they will tell you your life history and garnish it with a few slaps here and there.

8) Love keeps no records of wrong...Ladies please stop lamenting on how mr X did this and that to you while you have a present Prince Charming, there is a reason why he is now an X. Guys, Yes! babe messed up friday night in the month of January 2006 c'mon now, build a brigde and get over it already.

9) Love does not rejoice in evil but delights in the truth...They say the truth is bitter, the lie you will tell will be deadly once the truth is revealed. If you love her how you claim to then make her your one and only now. Honesty and trust should be the foundation of every relationship i believe.

10) Love always protects, hopes and trusts...Protecting is not the same thing as being in the girls air bubble. She wants to go out but she needs to take permission, you will fear daddy stunts now. Love trusts, a guy is in a club but wifey is at home, she has endless peace until she knows oga is finally in his house, ALONE! I know in todays world there are so many things and issues to keep you on the look out but c'mon, i feel it you really trust, even if he is in a hotel room with another girl, you should have a little assurance that nothing is going down. That is trust.

11) Love Never fails. Love always has a way of proving itself, you may split but there is still that little spot in your heart that can not be tampered with for the person. Love is divine, it is a peaceful 'God' feeling.

KK so i am done with that. The reason for this post is abou this guy that has basterdized the term LOVE. We had a little something i think a while ago and i was getting too uncomfortable, and once i am uncomfortable, i time you to adjust, if time expires and you are not on your way to brightness, I give you the red card, there is no time to waste any longer.

So we split months ago and this dude will not free a sister till tomorrow, my problem is that he is sharing me with drinks....YES! i am possessive like that, he wants me abi? so therefore he will be mine and mine alone. We were talking one day on the fone and unconsciously he said 'Babe i will call you back later i need to concentrate on my drinks!' like FORREEAALL???? i just cut the fone and txt him saying 'do not bother calling please!'(I have major issues with a drinker or smoker) i never want to be in the position of hearing 'baby i was high and that is when it happened' no oo! nothing should happen because I can't shout.

Apart from his drinking stuff i recently learnt he has a smoking side aswell....KAI! the two things i jus cannot stand. I mean, i can stand a little drinks here and there but when in becomes an addiction, your time will begin to tick.His liver has started getting infected from too many drinks but he will not learn.

He has toooooooooooooooooooooo many girls on his case, and that is the problem with all these fine boys. Flirting and such.

He says he loves me almost everyday, and i always reply "You do not love me yet, when you do i will know" Love is sacrifice, if he cannot go easy on the drinks, girls and his other issues or atleast pretend when i am in the area then do not think this missy will look you direction anytime soon. Thank God for facebook to day i saw his status talking about the next drink on his mind and as usual about 5 girls had commented. Hiss!

I am also OFF distant relationships. I can't mess like that for a minute.

Randomly on one of them days when he proffesed his 'love' for me i asked what love just for comedy effects and he said...I don't know b but what i feel is not normal. I'm like I'm sure it's not.(sarcastically)

I know i am not perfect and so i should not think there are any perfect earthlings around but i sure can get a non smoker/drinker or atleast find someone who will honestly love me and me alone. So my heart is currently locked and don't think it will be open anytime soon. People i see nowadays are not looking for love. Why do we love those that ignore us and ignore them who actually love us? Ironical i must say.

PS: I heard a very i don't know what to call it story some days ago in a conversation with a friend. That a guy has been dating his girlfriend for 4 years and the girl has had 5 abortions (innocent kids that did not beg to come into this sinful world) the guy still has the ANIMALISTIC heart to beat up the girl when he gets angry, but the bf has never cheated on the girl in these four years,(i don't believe) because they are in LOVE!? please what kinda of violent love is this? my brain has not been able to process it at all o! 4 years, 5 abortions and physical batter? Please coin another term as that is not love. Anyone that raises his hand over a woman is NOT a man!

KK so i am done babbling!

bloggatedly yours,

Sunday, July 12, 2009

We fall Down, But we get UP!

So a brief update on my last post "Shattered but Hopefully not broken". (Excuse my manners, hope you all had a wonderful sunday and kept it saved and sanctified.) I was SO sleepy in church today i hardly heard anything in church but the fact i was there was satisfied my conscience but on the reels i did not hear one thing the Pastor said I only can tell You the topic was ......'When the river flows', i don't know how or why or when the rivers flows, i tried to stay alert but i jus could not. :D, that was by the way.

I have never been so scared in my life like this passed weeks i must confess, saying prayers all day long, (or as soon as i get reminded that someones life is at stake), i have drained my brain from all the Bible verses i know, i became a real preacher on the reels. I have never seen this person i have always known to be full of life and love and ambition grow so bitter,suicidal (i won't lie I was always checking my fone to make sure no one had text me to say ....'and she lived a good life....') full of hate and anger and you could tell how present the devil was in her life. Her heart has been on alot of hell-kissed activity for the longest time now.The devil is a liar, Can i get an "Amen?"

I really cannot explain why it is soo hard for me to write this, i am short of soo many words but my heart is full of what I want to blog about. She is right now trying to get back on her feet after such a life-draining experience....I wish i was paid enough to take her on a 'Ladies Spa Week' because i would have still been on the ground and not anywhere close to thinking about getting up.Bittersweet if you ask me but mainly bitter, every disappointment is a blessing, i have really come to realise what that means. I thought all hope was lost in her situation and i did not like what was happening because a little push sends me straight to the ground, this was a BLOW but to God that never gives us anything we cannot handle she survived and is BACK on her feet.

I have come to realise, going through hell and high waters makes you grow up whether you are ready or not. It brings out a part of you that you are scared of discovering, a part of you that you never want to know exists. I once use to be the 'older sister' well not biologically but reverse is the case right now. I have a new respect for her I can't even lie because i will just be a hater. But honestly apart from making you wiser and stronger why can't we learn or understand life from good experiences? Why must it knock you down before you understand? is it because of Eve? and Adam? are they the full cause of our misfortunes?.....

She use to say 'Pray for me to die pls!' 'I don't want to live anymore' 'God hates me' 'I am useless' such bitterness flowed from her lips. I never want to be a part of any unhappy moments LOL well not like it's possible but i would choose the smiley days to the teary days. Mehn my lips are always moving, either am making sense or am just babbling but when i needed my 'radio' it was not responding lol, i was soo short of words it wasn't even funny. It is soooo relieving to know "Stella got her groove back" (she isn't Stella Oh!) life has never been worth living for her like now, as a matter of fact today she txt me saying all that went down was probably just God dat planned for it. Ofcourse he did, sometimes God lets us go down so that we can remember he exists, you know it's like a wake up call.

You want to live a life that is hassle-free? maybe the next life because at one point in life, we ALL must have a conversation with the devil. She is happy, strong, still on her journey of finding herself in better light though but my tension has been reduced. We all fall down but what determines how successful you become is if you rise up. Never give the devil that happiness he looks or searches for in your life, let him know that he is too little and he is marely wasting his tyme on you as you do not entertain such rubbish.

PS: To who this is about, If you are reading this post, Know that I love you so much and you have done me proud, You are a phenomenal woman and you will soar on great heights that the world will stop and stare in awe. Your best is yet to come, worst is over. yesterday is history, tommorrow is a mystery and today is reality. Make great use of it and run your race. You have taught me to be responsible and bold. To stand for what i believe in and never let the world or anything mess with what I know as truth. I also learnt, I am my own competition. I love you sweetz! Weldone. Heaven smiles at you believe me.

************End of That************

This is totally random but why do ladies feel it's okay to be hit by men?

Is it right for you to be your man's 'Only' while you are waiting in line in his own queue?

Why are men afraid of commitment? Prison-like i hear but isn't it prison for ladies?

It is a thing of shame to be a virgin in todays world, Why?

Men want to marry virgins but they disvirgin ladies before they say 'I do.'

Why is there so much jealousy or envy? It's kind of a competition now, someone gets something, the next day the neighbour is going shopping for hers...

People no longer cut their coats according to their sizes...oversize is now on-board.

Young kids are now adults, doing big things....Literally!

okay i think this randomness is getting out of hand, these are just few things that run through my summer jobless mind. BTW, this week I am taking a trip to DC/New York for a lil 'me-time'. So i may not blog for a minute. Have a wonderful week ahead and don't forget, you're never fully dressed without a smile. And never feel you have to even out differences yourself, take the mature route and let it slide, watch how many people you will suprise by not getting mad over a lil somthn somn.

NB: Speaking of anger, i just found out I have a verrryyyy annoying roommate for the fall semster, like ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhggggggggggggggggrrrrrrrrrrr i want to kick rocks!!! I am sooooo going to Housing office tommorrow!!! KMTTTTTTT!

Bloggatedly Yours....


Saturday, June 27, 2009

Shattered but hopefully not Broken!

She got a very heart-breaking message, a message that changed all of her life. It was one of those messages that you ask the messengers 'are you sure you were told to deliver at this address?' it was all she wished for herself but at the same time it was not what she actually was ready for, you know when you think you want something but when it's time to recieve you just want to change your mind but you find out it's TOO LATE!. She sits down today asking.....God why?
where did i go wrong? what next? where do i go from here?. She can't remeber what a smile looks like. Depression knows her by name, bitterness walks around the park with her hand-in-hand daily, confusion resides in the warmth of her heart, guilt sends a bouquet of flowers to her every morning unfailingly.

I sit down every minute of the day asking questions that almighty google has no answers whatsoever to. I find solace when i sleep without those midnight interuptions that wake me up the minute i happen to fall asleep after alot of conversations between myself and my heart. I try to laugh during the day in order to maintain a little sanity. I ask myself what words i should say to her? what does she want to hear? why did this happen? does she deserve it? Why does God always pick the best rose in the garden? What is the right thing to do? Alot of conflicts go through my head. It is one thing to prepare for a journey and another thing to actually embark on this journey. ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!!!!! am i even making any sense? Madness has slowly started creeping into my heart, please bear with me!

Crying tears....tears of pain, guilt, pressure, confusion, insecurities amongst many others. I want to help, i want to be there, i want to be a source of happiness. I hate all of this. Like an ocean without it's waves, so is she without laughter. Everyone around is choosing selfishness over selflessness.
Everyone is airing their views that do nothing but pile up more complications.
Like broken pieces of fine china, her life has been scattered into fragments of fear, indecisivness and confusion. She is scared of life. She took the boldest steps ever that till next year i still lie to myself i would have done. She came face-to-face with the devil himself, she is not armed to fight this war, don't get me wrong but she chose to run her race and stand out, even if it meant she stood alone. I was impressed!

She needs to hear words of affirmation, words of encouragement, words that will restore the strength she deposited in her fight with Hell. She needs to know after the rain, the sun will shine. God did not bring her this far to let her go, she questions God, nature is no respecter of persons. I need to get myself together. What happened to LOVE? where did she go? does she not know that she is needed right now? So i was looking for a solution and stubbled upon this poem.:

After the Storm

The storms may come And limbs may break
Yet others bend Beneath the weight--
Of heavy rain And windy breeze...
A storm can mark The strongest trees.

Life sometimes deals With us this way;
In unseen trials We meet each day.
It's not how much our bodies break
Or how much they may bend;
It's our outlook in our own life
That helps our spirits mend.

~Hilen Letiro.

I REALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY love her (no homo) just pure divine love. If she is not happy, best believe i do not have a smile on my face either. She needs to learn to Love again. Life is trying to frustrate her but she needs to look beyond it all and choose to be strong and happy. At the end of every tunnel, there is light abi? I need to make her stand infront of a mirror daily and confess:







She has hit rock bottom and is at her lowest state in life, i don't think she will ever face anything with so much gravity as this and i am willing to stand at the finish line and cheer her because she has done well. In life, we all fall at a point, what determines victory is if we rise and YES she is going to rise. Darkness never lasts forever, though some nights seem like morning has forgotten its place.

My heart is heavy but i am strong. Defeat respects me because i will conquer it.
All this will pass.
If you are going through anything, have the assurance that it would not last too long
She wishes for death to come and end this misfortune but is that the answer?
She is scared of being strong, of waking up to happiness someday.

~~~~~~~~~~I will end this post by dropping a few encouragement quotes!

Fall seven times, stand up eight. ~Japanese Proverb

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much. ~Mother Teresa

The difficulties of life are intended to make us better, not bitter. ~Author Unknown

"Instead of giving myself reasons why I can't, I give myself reasons why I can."
~ Unknown

Am out people...i pray you have a happy filled week!...xxxxx

Bloggatedly Yours,

Chocolate. <3

Thursday, June 18, 2009

NeVer say The 'F' Word!!!.....EVER!!!!

...mmmmm He had the brightest smile ever, He walked like he controlled the world with every footstep, I would forever remeber that trail of fragrance he dropped as he walked by, lets talk about the Magical African Swagg....this brother was fully endowed! Those lips that whispered breath-taking NOTHINGS! Magnificent.....Mr.I-would-be-there-Always! Just when i began to inhale him into my system.....I got infected. I invited him into my heart but he came with a couple of friends, (Lying & Cheating)


I was the trusting to a fault girlfriend, believe me i trusted in every sense of the word. As worn-out as the phrase is about the kind of people that if they told you good morning, open ur curtains and look outside for yourself just to be sure. He believed he was the best thing that heaven dropped to earth after micro-waves! He dwelt on the opinion that the world revolved around him. Very controlling i must say, the kind of Beast that if you were engaged in any kind of argument and for some reason you were at fault, he would open his mouth to tell you "Shut-up" and you had dared not to open your mouth for the sanity of yourself. At the very same time he had a sweeeetttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt tongue...asin if this boy was to convince you on something, you will zero out anything anybody wants to tell you and believe JUST his own story!

What happened to me? where did i fall off track? i used to be the kind of girl people classified as 'heartless' but if only they knew what i was facing, but i STILL DIDN'T LET GO! .... my self esteem used to be at its peak and i took no rubbish from any one prior to this great mistake in my life (did i just say mistake?....nope, it was a great learning experience for me and i loved every bit....AFTER I HOPPED OUT) lol. People used to ask me what was wrong with me? was i blinded or was it Jazz (Ju-Ju). I got alot of threatning calls from mysterious girls all along saying...'if by tomorrow i hear you are still dating ******* i will kill you' SHUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! na me b dis? but as usual, his name always sounded so good because it was always in someones mouth, he always lied about girls being on his case like he was the only male creature on the face of the earth. I still held on...U go fear Juliet fighting for Romeo now!

I will live to remember a day i was asked by a good friend of mine if i was still dating this guy, and in my happiest state of mind that day, ofcourse i told her yes PROUDLY without even thinking about it, to my disappointment, she told me she had a conversation with him and he told her we broke up! (Chimmmoooooo) I really was a stupid and crazy somebody, even me sef when i sit down n think of that phase of my life i ask whether my brain was on strike. Who was he to deny me? I am Pricele$$, no girl on the surface of this earth that crosses his path will have my patience. I am not swearing o, it's just that Karma..........hmmmmmmmm....u know now! He was so sweet i must admit, maybe that's what obstructed my view of reality and left me sinking in an ocean of 'Love'.

He was going through so much in his life, so i permited some of his rubbish.I had this drive in me that i would be different from other girls he dated and i will Stand Out no matter what happend.I felt it was my responsibility to be there for him and offer a hand of friendship when life ran him over couple of times. It crushed my when he messed up but i got back on my feet and moved on. I will never forget the day when we were chatting around 2am one faithful day, me being generally open and laughing and having no secrets to reveal because he knew everything there was to know about me, when he went quiet for a while....ahn ahn! i thought to myself what happened to this chatter-box that never knew how to turn down his volume?....he went all of a sudden quiet! then he said he needed to tell me something.

Him: Baby!.....Please don't get angry withh me!

Me: Wasap?

Him: I have been keeping this in my mind for soo mong but it's hunting me down because i know how honest you are to me.

Me: Okay, stop speaking parables to me and lay the matter on the table right now!

Him: Baby I am soo sorry, please forgive me, i did not mean to.....I know you will get angry but please don't be angry baby!
(HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM....don't baby me oo...i Know what's comin)

Me: Can you please tok to me? its 2.30am and my eyes are getting shut!

Him: I............................had sex with her.

Me: hehehehheh......with WHO??
( I had warned him about some girl that was getting too close for comfort a while ago and as usual he said she was all up in his space and he was tryna resist her)

Him: *******

Me: (Boiling soooo hard, an egg would have been cooked in 5secs)...Goodnyt

(Signout of MSN)

He gave me the dumb excuse that he was drunk and the POOR GIRL climbed on him.

I lay soo cold in my bed that night:Questions.....
where did i go wrong?
was i over bearing?
was he taking advantage of me?
could it be a problem he had?...always wanting to sleep around.
should i break-up?
should i stay?
was this part of the plan?

I was warning him but he did not listen to me WHAT HAPPENED TO FOREVER??? So many things ran through my mind that night, i slept after a while. I did not speak to him for a few days for him to remember i had feelings aswell and i was not a door mat that u come and clean your legs on when u wanna waka outsyde. It was pain -FUll but i swallowed it after a while and took him back after a while. I thought to myself, This MUST be love. He was the happiest person (or so i thought) when i took him back...Only God knows the number i was on his queue of ladies...Bless my heart...sob** I was at a point where i could not even talk to my best friend because she already classified me as Stupid....100% ode sef! I did not listen to any one, i ran my relationship MY WAY! until ofcourse i hit rock-borrom! and trust me i hit it HARD! We made plans of out imaginable future together, how many kids, you being in your music/acting whatever industry while the runway was my playground....OOOOO dem days!....when you will send me love songs and i will sing them till my voice got all crusty! u use to call me your model!

But to God be The Glory!(Yuuulllzzzz, some naija film effects) You are not fooling me ANYMORE! asin kaiii! me sef i wonder what happend to me because like a veil was taken away from my eyes. I cant imagine how many people that tried talking to me felt when they were trying to wake me up(bless their hearts)special shout-out to *I dono how to insert links yet* but to i am sure if i was within reach, she would have slapped and knocked and shouved alot of sense into me. (U are much appreciated) What i honestly weep for right now is the poor girl you are with ....the same one you cheated on me with...she is hurt on a daily basis but she does not know the way out, because you LIE! but someday, she will see the light and RUN into it!. I learnt so much after that experience, it was a bitter-sweet time. And being the kind of person i am, i do not like to be warned though i will take note of what you say, i still like to take chances and see for myself, afterall your judgements may be wrong! in this case they were right but ofcourse i learnt my way!. But for now, my heart is on break till Jan,1 2010. :) So after that experience i never wanna hear the 'F' word for a longggggggggggggggggggggggggg minute! All prospective lovers, please coin out a new term as i would not be entertained with the 'F' word!

I am outtttt!!! P.S: Pray for my dear Caramel, she has shoppinlitis and there are no drugs that are working for her! Bloggatedly Yours! Chocolate!...xxxxxxxx (I tried to elongate my post today..)

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Confession of a teenage ShoPahoLic!!!

ok ok ok....i am FINALLY admitting to this: I AM A MAD ASS SHOPAHOLIC!!!
There! i said it!!!! ok no,no for real its bad, and it gets worse everyday!

I am obsessed with spending money and shopping. I don't know how to stop. I have been this way for a long tym nowwww. Every credit card I have is maxed out, and yesterday i spent **** (u dont wanna know!). Btw i only went in 2 the shop with the intention to buy a scarf and i ended up lavishing my 'ego!' Going to the mall or even to super markets o, imagine! it's very hard for me, not when I get there but because I think of going all the time. My friends practically drag me out of shops, it's quite embarassing though but they can't stand it too. My cousin tries to keep track of how i spend, she calls me everyday to ask what i bought, and DUH i LIE!!
When I am at school, I think of going to buy things. When I am at home, I think of things i need(basically things i want :)....) and things i know i dont need and I must go and get them.

I don't know how to stop, and I don't know why I am like this. I have 147 pairs of pants. That is only a tiny amount compared to the number of tops i have bought recently :-S...not like i even need them all...i have so many in my wardrobe i can't even remember ever buying! kmt.. so many shoes i cnt even wear and i dont even remember why i bought them in the 1st place!i've tried hiding my card but it dnt work (stupid i no) what the hell can i do anyway??, its in me!!! Wen i know all i have to do is swipe my card..hehehe.. ok on the real, i NEED to stop! Please, if you have any advice for me, or anyone does, I really need help. I have never heard of anything like this, but I know my wanting to shop like this can't be normal.

I hide things I buy but it has gotten to the point that I can't anymore. I have also lied about where the items I buy come from or how much they were to my boyfriend and my bestfriend (im sowi chocol8! i cudnt afford to tell you the truth!). Can you imagine my boyfriend says he is gonna collect my card and give me money weekly (yh ryte lyk dats possible, he even spends more than i do). My boyfriend searched my room yesterday and i got caught..hehehe, it was funny!... Mehn nufin seems to be working for me ryte now o...

Blogattedly posted by: Caramel..
P.S: id rili do with suggestions and advice pls!

Monday, June 15, 2009


I need to SCREAM!!!

Should i jump out of the window???

Should i listen to music???

Should i talk or should i listen???

eerrrrrmmmmm......should i excercise???

Isn't this what i always wanted??

Why don't i get it right??

Why can't i express anger?

Why do i have mood swings?

Why is it okay for you to get mahd but i don't have those equal rights?

Where is my Caramel?

Who understands me?

Why wouldn't school start so i'm always occupied?

I do not need a man to make me happy.....RIGHT?

Why are they irritating me?

Why is she adding to my problems??

Does she know her worth?

Does she think am tripping over unnecessry stuff?

I want to sleep and wake up in august...(maybe not)! ....well just sleep and nothing else!

I want to go shopping to forget this!

I miss my daddy.....i miss him saying 'u will be okay!'.....'u will make it!'....R.I.P!

Maybe i should start an excercise class and kick rocks or maybe punch it all out!

WHY me? i too quiet?

Okay maybe am ranting a bit too much but sorry....MY FINGERS HAVE THE POWER!

What happened to my slogan...'Never let your emotions run over your intentions?'

Maybe i should go and put on make-up and take pictures .....JUST BECAUSE!

nahhh!.....let me look for my fone right now.(i lost it so no one calls to irritate me more)

Okay....i need to BREATHE SLOW....count from 1-10 with my eyes closed....COMPOSURE:::

Read my Bible?

Okay blogsville.....let me be productive and stop being a cyber junkie!

Hope you all have a wonderful week and don't let any MAGA stand in your way o!!!

Why don't girls know their worth? You are dating a guy but still sulking over your ex boyfrend that is avoiding you, how does that work? When you opened your mouth to speak, he always shut you up. You are complaining about him being a bit too close to some girls and he opens his dryyyy mouth to tell you 'i can't help it' WHAT THE HECK? did he just say that to you? My father taught me that i am an EXPENSIVE child and no one should make me sweat for 1 day. (Yeah he loves/d me like that)Why do you settle for less when you can get more than what you have?.....Ah! whats even worse is when i m told 'you just don't know him!' REALLLY??? when will i know him? is it when he starts Chris Brownin u and what not?my own is just that i am tired of being a love doctor, i do not have a boyfrend and my life is hitch-free and i refuse to be in the middle of your issues! i warn you every other day but no...that fool just does not have a heart,she does not understand! okay ooo! i don't wanna know again. When you finnally wake up and smell the Frapuccino, holla al me! Love us blind abi?....Keep one eye open ejjjooo! i Can't and will NOT shout!. PLEASEE KNOW YOUR WORTH! BTW why do guys cheat when theor girlfriend is a full meal with an extra bag of chips?(Post for another day).....Am OUT!

Bloggtedly yours!


Wednesday, June 3, 2009

God where are you @?....what's happening?

On a serious note, What is really happening to the world, to people, to both young and old? I have been reflecting on alot of stuff lately and i have noticed that God has all of a sudden become a BIG joke to the world. What happened to the days when as kids, it was friday but you were already disturbing mum about the preety dress she bought recently that you were going to wear on sunday? When you could not wait to go and get snacks from church and see your friends.....the times when you were first i the whole house to wake up from sleep on sunday morning (even before the security guard)? when you were all jumpy and excited on the thought that it was FINAAAAAAAAALY sunday! that was the time you had a big smile on your face through out the day and for some the next few days.It's really sad that many people that grew up i a christian family open their mouths today in sincerity to ask if God really exists. What happened to the days when you did not care on how true the fact that you were told "Jesus loves you" but as far as your sunday school teacher mentioned it, that settled it. Where did your faith go? Remember there was a point in your life when you did not have any complications on faith whatsoever the case may be or you believed God is good because the Bible said so.

Some days ago i was just on a little chill time with my girls when i saw this guy with about three ladies all to himself (and NO they were not his sisters i promise), he was feeling all sexy and fly with his sagged pants quarter-to-drop, chain blinging and such, i couldn't care less as that was the way he chose to live but what got my attention was the fact that he had a pink rosary on his neck (the catholic prayer bead) and he had a pink shirt on. I immediately thought to myself ' SWEET JESUS!!!the rosary has all of a sudden become a fashion accessory.' The next day, I was walking and i saw a t-shirt that read....

I understood it was created for comedy but what i still question is if the person really know what he was doing. It really isnt a funny issue that we no longer respect or have that 'fear' of God. Everyone wants to be 'big', it's sad that church is now looked down on. Few days ago i was talking to one of my girls on a video i saw on facebook titled 'don't waste your life',the conversation went along the lines of;
ME: i just watched a vid on facebook o! 'dnt wastee your life' did you see it?

HER: yeah! i was trying to watch it and it was just crap.

ME: You should see it o it reali makes sense, atleast itl make you ponder an set you back on track just as it did for me.

HER: okay lemme see it.......
(few mins later)

HER: abeg its preaching i dnt even get the point.

ME: it's a song o madam. But don't you sometymes feel like your wasting your life? i've been feeling like that lately. Like i know where i want to go when we rapture but is that really where i am going? i've been asking myself...

HER: Please jist me aanything abeg am bored.

ME: no i want to talk about this its important

HER: abeg!....Buzz me when you finish talking.
I could not believe this was the same person that i grew up with and we use to meet every sunday in church and have all the choreoraphed dances together. Inasmuch as we hate thinking about God, we should grow up and face it, he is REAL! I do not want to be stammering when God asks me what i did with my life on earth or what i did with the talent he gave me. It is very alright to be a christian and be cool. You do not have to be smoking the 'good stuff' and playing all the girls you set your eyes on to acquire that title. Life is a journey and not a destination, the destination will be determined when God has asked you all he wants to know and God forbid for God to look anyone reading this in the eye and say 'I never knew you' and cast you into the lake of eternal fire.

It's a choice you have. The same girl i was talking to told me that she has to live life now and when Judgement day comes, God will have mercy on her so what the hell. i did not battle with her because she knows what is right but she is making the effort to be 'cool' according to the worlds standards. What i cannot stand are double-faced girls. A girl that goes to the same school as me is 'supposed' to be good, her mother was to come visit (and she knew ho her momma trained her to be) and so she called me and was panting like she had jus seen a ghost to ask me if she could please come and keep some of her clubbing clothes in my room as her mother would tear her bum off if she sighted them. i was like why do you put yourself through this? is it really worth it? know who you are and live up to all your parents brought you up to be.

God listens!! he is actually waiting for many people to give him the wheels of their lives and sit back and let him take care of your journey. No matter how bad you may think you have been or what not, give him a brief chance to show himself off to you. So many hurdles you try to jump over but can't because God has not given you the strenght and you can't do it alone till you let him do his part. Get back to where you use to be. When you use to carry a big heart on your chest with a cross in the middle from your sunday school class to remind you that God loves you and actually gave his life up JUST for you.


Bloggatedly yours,


Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Pardon??......You said??

I'm sure you missed me a bit, i apologize for my absence. Onto the issue of today...... it has been an on going error we all have or at a certain point we all have fallen short of one of these. So sometime ago, i decided that i wanted to speak good english, No i did not "shell" or whatever you choose to call it as the case may be. I spoke relatively good english and to some my english was 'over the top.' (no i am not tooting my horn) but i noticed i used words or phrases incorrectly or just generically. I decided i no longer wanted to communicate according to the Nigerian status quo as you would have it as in life i was going to come in contact with a lot of important persons from far and wide as well as different nations.....i therefore have a goal to speak properly.

So i am about to list a few words/phrases i am consciously working on correcting or basically words/phrases commonly "mistaken" or used incorrectly by a lot of people. Please feel free to add whatever i miss out or let me know if you concur as well so i correct myself and others in the long run. (I just decided to add some razz sayings by my beloved Nigerians just for fun. lol (enjoy)

*"I'm Coming" NO! you are not coming, you are actually going as you say this instead of 'give me a minute or i'll be back.'

*We still or many of us use "Maggi" for every seasoning cube the markets have to offer, Maggi is a brand name NOT a general word for seasoning cubes.

*Just as i previously mentioned above, the same goes for every toothpaste being generally called "Maclean," i personally am not a victim of this.

*"Go-Slow" as opposed to traffic/traffic jam. Some people go as far as "Hold-Up," doesn't that kinda mean "stick-up?" ...... i am just saying.

*Could you please be "upstanding?" meaning 'please, stand up!' Doesn't 'upstanding' refer to like a morally respectable or upright person? Tell me please!.

*"Reverse back,"........eeeeeeeeeermmmm....can you reverse forward?

*"Rewind it back"......... People how far now?

*"Next tomorrow", okay so i said that a lot as a young one and even till today i unconsciously say it but it's on my "to-do list" to get it off, yes i am trying my best..... People it is 'the day AFTER tomorrow'.

*"She was ON black shirt and blue jeans" You would even be lucky to hear Jeans as some people would prefer to say "JEAN TROSER" WHAT THE HECK?????

*"PULL your shoes!!"......NO, i want to PUSH IT! kmt.......

*"Sheltox" (Sp?) for any kind of insecticide i forgot to mention at the top.I guess its a Nigerian thing to generalize brand names for everything under the same category. The list goes on....OMO (detergent)

*"Dress" as opposed to 'move/scoot'.

*She "CHANCED/SHUNTED" instead of 'cut me'.

*I want to "EASE" myself, NAIJAAAAAAAAAAAA.

*Pronouncing the 'b' in "PlumBer".....ummmm, last time i checked it was silent.

*How about when people pronounce 'SUITE' as "SUIT". AAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

*Pardon me....When people say "MESS" in an effort to say 'fart'. (I couldn't help it) lol.

*Have you just noticed how everywhere that is beyond the border of Nigeria is all of a sudden "Abroad". Hmmm, that word may be accurate but NO it is Not accurate to me.

~~~~~~~ENOUGH SAID~~~~~~~~

That is all i can re-call for now, drop anything you feel is meant to be here that i omitted, People PRAY please, We DO NOT need to be referred to as "animals" OR the likes in areas we are trying to make a living in. Please, have your reputation at heart anytime you open up your mouth to speak. Thank You, i await your comments.....

(have a wonderful week ahead and Thank You all, My 'Oga' is well. Your prayers were answered *Molar-to-Molar* smile.)

Monday, May 11, 2009, bored, restless and BLOGGING!

So tell me why it is still cold in SUMMER??? i thought winter was gone, i did not even feel spring sef, tell me why the stupid clouds wanna release unncessary 'blessings' on my little city....i can not recall asking for it. Does the pool know i want to get to show off my soon-to-be-purchased-as-soon-as-the-sun-promises-to-stay BIKINI!!!!!? isn't summer tired of seeing my winter clothes already? come.......are you not fed-up with me ranting? okay, i think i heard a couple audible 'yesses' lol i will stop. The fact is that i am honestly bored and facebook is killing some of my 'few' brain cells,(hahaha...God forbid my brain cells are too much sef my head is asking for more storage space) i don't want to be in school tonight just because....Okay my main reason for blogging is because my caramel has turned nurse overnight, reason is because her Oga is under the weather ehen, so she is on 24h duty, Reason why she has been missing on here.Oya, make una close your eyes and be in the attitude of prayer.

"In the Matchless name of Jesus,we pray for speedy recovery oh! God abeg slap him with health, may Strength smile at him tommorrow and stability knock him left, right and center. Devil, any malaria or fever plants you planted in his body, we begin to uproot and throw into the bottomless pit. Father i know you are restoring every missing or broken nerve and also replacing full health back right now. Thank you for we hav prayed and askd with thanksgiving. AMEN!!"

Oya open your eyes. arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh! so it is almost time for me to go back to school (yes, because of the unfailing love my mother has for me, she sent me to a christian University WITH curfew) lol. So i basically spend my day out of school till curfew. Am doing summer school so i have a preety flexible daily schedule,tell me why my laptop has decided to stop working now.It is going to the clinic ASAP tommorrow though! Did i forget to mention i HATE school? it is a very painful thorn in my flesh but slowly but surely it will soon be over. People ask if i was adopted because my siblings are TOTALLY different from me but i understand we all have our interest so i really cannot be bothered. okay blogville, i wish you a successful and hitch-free tomorrow and IF i dnt blog tomorrow, have a splendid week.

Still bloggatedly yours,


Friday, May 8, 2009

.....So i CAN'T help but "Thank!"

So yeah i have been AWOL on blogville, i apologise. Too much enjoyment is worrying me oo but na God do am...who am i to complain? on the reverse i am so so so so so....(did i say soooo?) grateful to him... count your blessings abi? i can't but i will begin and wherever i heart continues lol.

* I thank God for feet, hands, a head, legs, stomach, hair, nails, well-functioning body organs.

* I thank God for the air i breathe, i don't live on life support or carry inhalers anywhere.

* I thank God for Caramel. They say friends are hard to find and that's just because she has been taken. :p

* I thank God for a loving family as mine, my family is unique in EVERY way, not your average family. I love them all to PIECES, needless to say i would not trade em.

* I thank God for sending me to a good University as ***, i don't deserve ANY bit of it.

* I thank God for helping my sister (a fellow blogger yall know) graduate suma cum laude. (1st class). Atleast i know my mum invested wisely in education. lol

* I thank God that inasmuch as i am a very unserious someborry in terms of school, 'C' no show for my finals. ....kai! Jesu you do me BETTER thing.

* I thank God for never wanting for anything without getting it. I sometimes take these things for granted because i am use to them but God sees my heart.

* I thank God for loving me and forgiving me even when i shouldn't be forgiven or loved. Even when am bitter to people, God overlooks it ALL...not SOME!

* I thank God i can wear heels and even catwalk sef in them sef, some people have spent all the days of their lives in wheelchairs. Even when i complain about walking too long, the koko be say i fit waka from point A to B.

* I thank God for fingers to type ooo...even as i don dey tire. long, sexy, errorless (is that a word?) bone structure. LOL.
<<<<<<< OLUWA, YESU, CHINEKE! Na Gode, Ose gan, Dalu>>>>>>>>

This was a long bum random post! Count your blessings name them one by one, and it will suprise you what the Lord has done.

Bloggatdly Yours,


Tuesday, April 14, 2009

10 little details about me, myself and I.

without much further ado(i believe that is how it is said) let me begin, but kai 10 things is too little for me to write on about my wonderfully and fearfully made self but i will manage. so here goes:
1. my name is chocolate (it came from my perfectly toned skin colour), in actual reality i do not have a tribal name at all but i sometimes wish for one, who knows before you know i would hae named myself officialy.

2. I have really strong pet-peeves like i HATE(with a capital "H") to see twisted bra straps...i jus feel like helping you untwist it. Also, i do not not like to see a pair of shoes in different directions or turned up-side down when they look preetier right-side-up.i do not know if it is untidiness or just ignorance.

3. I LOVEEEEEEE my friends and family with the last breath in me even though i am not an emotionally-expressive person as i have been told alot, i just hope they know what they mean to me and i am working on expressing myself. Actions speak louder abi?? me i dont know where i was when God was sharing that one oo...<<<<>>>>>>

4. I hateeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee to see so many words like in books, believe me they give me headaches i kid you not!. Probably the reason why i do not go to my school library ...hehheheheh... i just read all i have to for school and submit the remaining to my God!. i do not read books, magazines, TEXBOOKS or the likes but when it is time for exams i always make my way to the top.(NO. i do not cheat!):-)

5. For the longest time now, i have wanted to model but for very annoying reasons i get blocked by alot of obstacles. I know it is the devil, he is a liar and a 4-1-9ner!lol i am chasing my dreams because it has been screaming for a while now! i wanted to be a fashion design major but i have found myself in the psychology world!. i still will do it by His grace!

6. i LOVEEEEEEEEE earrings and bags and basically accessories, they just make a girl shine jooooooo(i do not mean fake goods abeg).. but my best of all is PERFUMEEEE! mehn the person that came up with that idea made enough sense...perfume perfume perfumeee.....that is why i get seriouly offended when someone has body odour! it has a personal effect on me. such people should be thrown down a cliff for all i care.

7. did i mention i am NARCISISSTIC??(I loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee myself to pieces because i know my worth oo! asn no one can use me as doormat...i do not roll like that thank You. i do not need to blow my horn...(maybe i do sometimes to feel that chill we need momentiarily) teeehhheeeeee.....

8. i LOVE jesus!(It was not intentional for me to put Him as number 8) he comes first!

9. I loveee and miss my caramel...she means the whole world and a bag of chips to me. (Yes am always talking about her go and find you own) iv got her back and i am 199% sure she has mine aswell, we never disappoint each other. Pure....Agape....non-erotic....friendship! i cant wait to see her....she gives me sooooo much joy jare!

10. i am a PHENOMENAL woman......i am not your average girl you see around...i have learnt and also perfected the art in loving myself because i am a queen and i have to love me for anyone else to!..

OK so this was a bit difficult but i pulled through!!....have a great day people.
~~~~~~~You Never Know how Strong You Are Until Being Strong Is The Only Option You have!~~~~~~~
No one should try and spoil your day oo....God pass all of dem!....oya smile! good children lol....

Bloggatedly Your own....


Monday, April 13, 2009

Sleepless Nyt........Caramel...

It is 3:44am now, i have changed my positions on d bed ova a thousand tyms nw! (without exageration). I cant sleepppp!!! what is rung with me, THIS IS VERY FRUSTRATIN!Strange things kip cumin in to my head, All kinds of things! I close my eyes for a second and all of a sudden i am kissing my teeth! AAAARGH! This has been hapening 4 days nw bt dis is da worse, todays own is veeery depressin honestly!
I wish i cud cal som1 up ryt nw to kip me company! (to think i have a boyfriend, HISS)!..............I evn tot id begin 2 fall asleep as im rytin bt atall! Well atlst, d gud thing is im tokin 2 u..OK>>>>> lemme c, wats on my mnd dis second?? OH YEAH! EVERYTHINGG all at ones! i am even rili struglin 2 pik one 2 tel u bou..mtcheeew!
Ok lets try nd tnk of sme possible causes of this...ummmmmmmm.....
**FEAR?? **DEPRESSION?? **ANXIETY?? **MY BF? **CONTEMPLATIONS?? **Could it be da drugs im on??**Cus i slpt in da aftrnun?? **GOD??
WHAT ON EARTH IS DA PROBLEM!?.....................Im seriosly thinkin o, asin its jus so smhw!, nt its lmst 4am, IMAGINE..Right now piple r peacefully aslip (includin my bf) LUCKY EM! I evn scard 2 pray, duno wer 2 stat 4rm!.........OH! i jus got a txt, im gesin its CHOCOLATE............................................YUP its her! i dnt get da msg tho, jus replied.......................Yh i no ur sugestin i tel ha i cnt slip, well i no ha ansa 'eya wts rung, My frnd go nd slip jo!' lol...she cud b dat crazy trust me, well i no cuz she tod me dat yesterday too.

OK! seriosly i need help! myb i nid 2 c a phycologist, mayb deyl b able to tel me wts rung? Its nt lyk iv met one b4...hmm its 4 am my brain stil de HYPER!
Im glad im able to pour my brain activnesness on!lol.............U no i cud b studyn 4 my exam since im awake bt lyk i sed, my brain seems to be in sum energetic mood ryt nw so id jus b starin at da book.....i dnt wnt 2 get fat if nt i wud av kept my mouth bizy wit sme cookies, or to show hw bad dis is i wud av warmd up a pizzza in d kitchen..hehehe! bt NAH! il jus blow up!
...............>>>>>OOOOH i jus tot of smtn! probably da silence in da room is addin 2 dis??? ok mayb i sud slot in a movie, il probably slip off yl wtchin wrks most tyms! :) ok BRB!
Yay! i jus did, i washd my face aswell...i hpe dis works..ok u no wt, il keep u ryt nxt to k! nd il letchu no if it wrks 2mrw nd if it doznt, xpct me bak!
Tnx 4 lstnin 2me, uv been such a darline....ttyl. MUAH! xxx
>Btw its 4:30am nw<

Friday, April 10, 2009

CARAMEL is in da building!

Hey! Hey! Hey!!! Hi its me CARAMEL, da oda half of my darlin ~SHOCOLAT~!lol.. Pls pls pardon chocolates gramatical errors in da last post, bt hey! no one is perferct ryt!lol.....anyway i LOVE her so much, i dnt have a choice, i av 2 get used to her ways.. 4 nw, we ain 2gda in person all tnks to scul!(mtcheeeew!), bt den OFCUS wer 2gda in our hearts. i lyk 2 cal wer she is 'chocoville' nd wer i am 'fabville'!
OK! Chocolate has partially sed it all, nd lyk i sed earlia im da oda half so its my duty to more lyk complete wat she hasnt completed.. CHOCOLATE et CARAMEL, some call us sisters, some call us friends, some call us bestfriends, haters call us lesbos(WU'EVA!), oda haters prefer 2 sit bak nd analyz us nd stil avnt come up wit more negative names, but trust! we'l update u with d latest hottest names k :-)...Anyway, we jus lyk to call ourselves BLOOD! U no lyk dey say 'blood is thicker than water' I ges dats d strngest but weak word dat cud describe us 2.
I am pretty sure most ov u readin dis av ur BFFL'z, ud rili enjoy dis blog cuz wer goin 2 b hooking u up with sme of da tips dat keep US bonded 4EVA! Nah nah nah dnt let ur eyes bolge ryt outa da sockets! dnt worry derz MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE to come. This blog is more lyk our diary, its gon' b filled evrything we tell ich oda, our history, our fillins, so many interesting stuff hapening around us & evrything els...(ofcurse our secrets too .
.......................................................BRB! I lyk to keep pipl anticipating...hehehe..XX

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Our very first!!!* exchanging scared glances*

ok so here we are, complete strangers in a new land we are yet to discover. Life is a risk abi???so WHARAHELL? this post will obviously not be constructed professionally and all that (free jus jo! the first time you come this place you messed up aswell) "Chocolate & Caramel" are two ladies that woke up one bright morning and decided to 'belong to blogville.' I hate to call us bestfriends because it just does not qualify us but you get my drift sha. If i tell you i know what is going to be on here, i give you official and certified authority to call me a liar. So keep your fingers and legs crossed in anticipation because ALOT is yet to unfold. We got inspired by fellow bloggers i must confess (rather I got inspired as Caramel is not really a 'reader' , i do not read as much but blogs can make me read, so I pulled her along with me, if my uni books were in 'bloggated' form (yes i make my words up) i would be a geek by now. okay so back to Chocolate and Caramel, we have grown together into beautifu women that have just basically stuck together THROUGH IT ALL, when I misbehave, she spanks me and when she misbehaves, i whoop her.....I kid! but i have never had any one close to me like she is as i am introverted.....maybe not anymore but time will tell. Abeg, i have to go now, my stomach has giving me warning to fill it up as it is running on 'e'.

cash ya rall layrassss!........
bloggatedly yours,

ps:Caramel will drop a few lines tommorow. xx